Wait a Minute, You're What?!?!
by Vega Ikari
Summary: Merton has something to tell Tommy, and rather weird something at that. (slash warning) (really really weird warning)
1. Wait a minute, that can't be right.

Big Wolf on Campus: Fan Fiction: Wait a Minute, You're What?!?!

Wait a Minute, You're What?!?!

Tommy entered the Lair a little more than confused. Merton had left a message that he needed to come over immediately but wouldn't give a reason why. Tommy's wolf-senses hadn't picked up any danger, and he and Merton didn't have a date the next night, but then again maybe his little Goth couldn't wait. Giving himself a wolfish grin, Tommy opened the door to the Lair and the smile dropped off his face. His lover was pacing back and forth biting his fingernails; this could only mean something was very wrong. Tommy waited a second to be noticed but the other had his eyes to the floor and was talking to himself. When Merton was like this you had to make yourself known. Tommy cleared his throat, and Merton's head snapped up. He looked like a deer caught in headlights.

"Oh hi, Tommy," he paused as another nail bit the dust. "Beautiful weather we're having? I think that low pressure system is really helping it cool down or would that be a high pressure system," and it continued like that. Yes, something was horribly wrong.

"What's the matter Merton?" Tommy stared at his compainion waiting for what he was sure a life and death response. Well, in a way, it was. Tommy waited in silence until Merton murmured something under his breath. The jock thought he had understood the others words but it simply couldn't be. "What did you just say Merton?" Tommy's eyes were wide just incase he had heard right.

Merton looked him the eye still biting on his poor nails. "I'm pregnant," Tommy stared for a second and started to laugh. It was a joke right, it had to be a joke. "What's the matter with you? I'm serious. I'm pregnant, with child, I've got one in the oven, I'm in a delicate way," Merton began to cry. "And you're not even taking me seriously. Sorry I'm a little hormonal right now." Wait a minute, Tommy knew his lover well enough to know the absolutely no joking voice and that was it. "I'm going to be a daddy," with these words Tommy Dawkins keeled over face first into the floor.

Merton moved over to Tommy and looked him over. He began dragging him over to the bed. "I don't need this. I'm pregnant. I should be pampered. If he's gonna passed out every time we talk about there is no way he's going into the delivery room with me," Merton dropped Tommy half-way. Walking over to his desk, he picked up his glass of water. Merton dumped the water onto Tommy's face.

Tommy sat straight up, breathing hard, eyes wide. "What happened?"

"You passed-out."

"Oh, I had the strangest dream. You said you were pregnant," Tommy looked Merton in the eyes and only got that t'was-not-a-dream look in return. Tommy felt faint again.

"Oh no, you don't!" Merton caught Tommy before he could take another concrete nap. If he let it happen again they could spend the whole day with Tommy passing out. Tommy jumped to his feet again.

"How? When? Where? Why? HOW? How could this happen?"

"Well, when two people love each other a whole bunch, they get naked...

"I know how normal people do it but were both men!"

"Well, that is true but I'm sure there a simple explanation for all this," Merton happily patted his partner on his back.

"Which is?"

"Which is what?"

"The explanation!!"

"Oh, yeah, I myself have no idea but I'm sure there's one. At first it reminded me of the movie Junior starring Arnold Schwarzenegger." "What happened?"

"It was Schwarzenegger's second real attempt at a comedic role. While it had a promising plot, I'm afraid that not only Arnold was unbelievable in his scientist role but the movie itself was considered to be a flop." "No, the picture movie."

"Oh, the main character was a scientist who participated in an experiment with human embryos. In the movie, their goal was to find out whether or not an embryo could develop in a man's body. While under going this experiment Arnold became emotionally attached to the child and keep it full term instead of aborting the experiment."

"So you're participating in some kind of experiment."

"Nope, not at all. That movie probably came to mind since I think it's that only ever made on the subject," Tommy fell onto the ground again. The insanity of the situation was getting to him, well a little less than when he had passed out. "How did you find all this out?"

"Well, remember at school how I was running out of class each morning because I was throwing up. The school nurse insisted that I go to the doctor. So a week ago the doctor took all my body fluids and called me back about what he found yesterday. He said it was all probably a mix up so he wanted to run his tests on me again. After the forth time, I could no longer pee, and he was still getting the same results. So, he did that ultra-sound thing, man it tickles, and he found the same thing. I'm a medical oddity Tommy!"

"You seem proud of that."

"I am, but I think my mom's a little disappointed in me. I think she always wanted me to have children later in life. Plus, I pretty sure she was excepting me to impregnate someone not the other way around." Tommy started to rub his temples. That at least explains Merton calmness to some level; he had had a day to get used to the idea. "What are we going to do?" "Well, I could go for some pizza."

"No, about the baby."

"The baby would be eating the pizza too, but fair enough. I haven't really thought that far yet. I'm keeping the baby because how many men are be able to say they gave birth to their child, plus I'm not even sure I could have an abortion if I wanted to. So, I guess we could get married and you could make an honest man out of me," Merton smiled. Tommy just stared. "Well, apparently we've hit on the point of way too much commitment for the great Tommy Dawkins," Merton flung-up his hands in the way Merton tended to do.

"No, it's not that it's just, I never really saw us having this conversation right now. I mean we're still in high school, and you're pregnant. I never noticed you were pregnant, I mean never."

"We've got a few more months of school. I won't even begin to show by then. Since a big fat pregnant man wouldn't go unnoticed I'll probably start college at the beginning of the second semester. I don't think I'll be able to breast feed though." Ok, Tommy needed fresh air at this point. For all the weird things Tommy had seen in his life, the idea of Merton breast feeding was just too much for his brain to handle.

"You know what pizza sounds good," Tommy followed the cheery Merton out, happy to be getting some fresh air. Tommy started to relax as he walked into the night's cool air; maybe if he prayed hard tonight this would be all a joke by morning.

"Oh, Tommy by the way, I have a doctor appointment next Thursday. The doctor said they really like to have the father there." suddenly the night didn't seem so claming anymore.

To be continued ....


	2. Wait a minute, you're a professional?

Wait a Minute, You're What?!?! - Wait a Minute, You're a Professional

Disclaimer: [Fill in the blank]

Wait a Minute, You're What?!?! - Wait a Minute, You're a Professional

All things considered, Tommy's life that day had started out normally enough; he woke up, showered, got dress, ate breakfast, and walked over to his boyfriend's to take him to the doctor see about his state. His state of course was being very pregnant...oh and did you notice the key word: boy. Tommy still hadn't completely come to terms with that part of the situation. Hoping the doctor would clear up that part of the mess, Tommy pushed open the door to the Lair.

The werewolf's lover was on the other side of the room standing in front of his body length mirror. Man, Merton could be vain. The jock smiled; he liked seeing Merton back to his old self. Tommy cleared his throat, making the Goth spin around. The boy walked across the room and put his arms around Tommy's neck.

"Tommy, will you still love me when I'm big and fat?" Tommy sighed, so much for back to normal.

"Of course," Tommy had been saying this all week. He had to go from shocked to reassuring in ten seconds.

"Why did it take you so long to answer?"

"I had to breathe,"

"You would rather breathe than love me?" Sadly, Merton being moody had seemed to become the norm the last few weeks. Tommy paused, this was a hard situation to talk yourself out of, just agree and continue.

"Of course not. I don't know what I was thinking. of course you're more important to me than oxygen," Tommy knew he had gotten the right answer when Merton pressed his entire body against him. Tommy had to wonder if the full nine months would be like this.

"Good, now come on or we'll be late," Merton grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the door.

*************************

"What's the name of your doctor again?" Tommy lend over to Merton as the receptionist came up to the small window. The ride to the doctor's office had been uneventful. Merton had thrown Goth baby names at Tommy while he smiled and nodded, hoping he could convince Merton otherwise when the baby actually came. 

"Here it's on the card," Merton handed over an appointment card. It turns out his normal doctor was not trained for Merton's 'unique' condition. Tommy read the card, yup it figures.

"What's the name of your doctor sirs?" the receptionist looked up from her oversized day-planner. 

"We're here to see Dr. Frankenstein,"

"That's Frank - in - sten." The two turned to find the owner of the voice. A doctor that looked more like mad scientist ran over to them. He spoke with an accent only found in B-rated horror flicks. "You two must be my special patients. I must admit in all my years I had never heard of such a thing. Please, come to my office, we will speak," the man ushered them into a small office. "Please, sit. I have been going through the test done by your doctor from before, and I found something very strange."

"You mean like a teenaged pregnant boy," Tommy interjected.

"No, now a-days there are teen pregnancies all the time. You would not believe. You children you never think. It is good to see you taking responsibility, it really is. I remember when I was in the old country, there was this young girl and she had a child. Little red-head, it was the devil's child I swear..."

"Doctor," Merton attempted to get the man's attentions back to the subject.

"It would cry, cry, dear god if I wasn't a doctor I would call a priest..."

"Doctor," Tommy joined in. 

"Poor Rosemary..."

"DOCTOR," they both yelled. The old man jumped in his seat.

"Why are you yelling?"

"What's did you find that was strange, I mean beside the obvious?"

"Oh, that, well it seems that the child was displaying abnormally fast growth, but we could be wrong. It will be a little longer before we now what is strange, all we know is something is strange. Really, this appointment is for questions and pills. Do you have any questions?" Tommy sheepishly raised his hand.

"Yeah, I have a question, I'm no doctor, but men can't get pregnant."

"Yes, this true. Not really a question but good to know, yes."

"How is Merton pregnant?" 

"Oh, I have models for this," the doctor pulled out a couple of dolls, "When two people love each other a whole bunch, they get naked.."

"I know how normal people do it!!!!" Tommy was towering over the old man on the verge of wolfing out. 

"Honey calm yourself," Merton put his hand on Tommy's arm. It hadn't been an easy week for Tommy, but he didn't want things to get any weirder with Tommy wolfing-out.

"All that stress is not good for you, no," the doctor shook his head.

He pulled out a brown bag. "Here breathe into this bag. It will make you fell better," Tommy took the bag and put up to his face. He had begun to hyperventilate trying to hold back the transformation. He was feeling a little faint.

"So, have you decided how you will tell your parent?" Sometimes the stress is just too much. Tommy went from feeling faint to getting an up-close and personal view of the floor. 


	3. Wait a minute, what are you trying to te...

Disclaimer: The people I use are made up by someone else; I really don't know who.

Wait a Minute, You're Telling Us What? 

Everything was normal at the Dawkins household that evening, well as normal as it ever is, which is, in fact, very abnormal. The youngest, Tommy Dawkins, had spent the last few days trying to figure out how to un-lift perhaps the strangest news, and keep in mind he is a teenage werewolf, he would have onto his parents and brother. His sudden nervous twitchy nature had not gotten pass his parents (It took a public broadcast to get through to his brother.) With great tension hanging in the air, the Dawkins family sat down to dinner. 

"So, Tommy how's everything with you a Merton going?" a simple Mommy question. This was enough to push Tommy over the edge. 

"What have you heard?" Tommy gripped the table. "It's not true, well maybe it is but where did you hear it? And I can't believe that you would even believe something like and not even hearing it from me. Merton, didn't tell you did he?" Mrs. Dawkins was speechless, whatever had been bothering her son it must be major. Tommy took her silence as a yes, of course. "I can't believe he told; I mean how could he. I guess it's really his business too, but you're my family," and so on. The Dawkins family merely stared confused, except for Dean who was currently watching a re-run of Friends. 

"I don't think letting him date that kid was a good idea. He's starting to act like him," Tommy's mom kicked her husband for the comment. 

"Ahh…. Tommy, sweetie, what's the matter?" 

"What's the matter? Merton's pregnant that's what's the matter!" oh yeah there was going be a meltdown in the Dawkins house. Gasps rang around the table. 

"Pregnant," Dean of all people join the conversation, hitting fist against the table. "No, Rachel can't be pregnant," then again maybe not. 

"Mom, what am I gonna do?" Mrs. Dawkins hadn't been excepting this conversation for quite a while. 

"Wait a minute, your both men, how can Merton be pregnant?" Mr. Dawkins asked with a rather perplexed look on his face. 

"Thank you," with that Tommy's head promptly fell onto the table. Mommy Dawkins moved over to her son and began patting him on the head. Suddenly, light went on in her head. 

"You and Merton have had sex?" something no child ever wants to talk to their parents about. Tommy went red in the face. A muffled 'yeah' issued from the table. 

"Well, Tommy first I'm very disappointed in you. What did you except would happen if you two went around experimenting with adult things?" 

"But we're both men!" 

"You should listen to your mother," Tommy started searching his pockets for his little brown bag while his mother went on. 

"Don't you know about," this next part came as a whisper, "protection?" Tommy shoot back up in fear his mother would start explaining. 

"Don't worry I know all about that." 

"Then why weren't you using it?" Tommy thought silence would be the best answer. His father decided to break it. 

"How far along is Merton anyway?" 

"About two months, but the doctor says it looks more like three," Tommy stated, he had at least rehearsed that part in his bedroom. 

"He's been pregnant for two months and you haven't told us?" mothers, you leave out the tiniest detail. 

"I've only known for three weeks. The crazy foreign doctor's the one making me tell you." 

"Foreign doctor?" his father jumped back into the conversation. 

"Dr. Frank - in - sten." 

"What's wrong with our doctor? You now he delivered both you and your brother." 

"Mom's a woman." 

"I know," Tommy sat silently, there was something in that 'I know" he couldn't deal with. 

"He's the doctor Merton wants. I think its best that he decides," Tommy breathed out when it became apparent this was an acceptable answer. The trio sat as the sounds from the TV filtered from the background. After the commercial break, Mrs. Dawkins turned to her son. 

"But even though you made a mistake, you know we'll also support you, if you take your responsibility in this situation. Have you thought about what you and Merton are going to do yet?" 

"Well, we're going to finish high school and go to college. After that, I have no idea." 

"Tommy, I can't believe this. I mean where are you going to live, you can't have a baby in the dorms. Where are you going to work, do you even know how much diapers cost?" it continued like this. As anyone with a mother knows, after a woman gives birth they acquire a special ability that allows them to rant for hours at their children without taken a single breath, Mrs. Dawkins was no exception. There was even a story about Tommy throwing up on her thesis for her masters in communications that could easily be re-called from any Dawkins family picnic. Finally, there was a short pause for air. Tommy's mother opened her mouth again when Tommy's father cut in. 

"Now, dear I think Tommy's had enough for one night," Mrs. Dawkins looked over to her husband as Tommy mouth 'Thank You' over her shoulder. 

"I suppose your right. You do realize you've made a Grandmother of me?" 

"Sorry," with that Tommy retreated. Dean chose this moment to lean back in his recliner. 

"So, what's up with Tommy this time?" 

"Merton's pregnant." 

"Next thing you know he'll be telling us he's the Pleasantville werewolf." 


End file.
